Born in the town of Aberdeen,
Of bees he was never too keen. (you know what I'm talking about John)
A younger brother he had,
Which one Christmas became a proud Dad. (water baby reference)
After higschool he went
To a college known for its drinking stints,
To years later become
That guy at holiday parties at home,
Now in Florida he resides
Where daily he cries,
For the love of a good bloggers ode.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Brilliant review of early 90's white rapper!!
...It all began with an inter-company IM conversation debating whether or not the song "college girls are easy" was written by the Beastie Boys or Easy E. Upon the research of my good friend Ray, it was discovered that neither artist, but Jesse Jaymes who penned this brilliant anthem. Though his album "Thirty Footer in Your Face" never won him fame or fortune, one Amazon reviewer felt he deserved more.
Read on. Please take no offense to this review, as I find the song titles and lyrics to be representative of 90's white hip-hop and the most failed, but hillarious attempt to be cool:
"Of all the early 90's white rappers with long, blond, curly hair Jesse Jaymes (or as all of his true fans refer to him "JJ") is unquestionably the best that there was, is and ever will be. His fearless and brutal lyrics bridge the ethnic gap between him and other artists in his genre. In "Shake it like a white girl" JJ tells us of his affinity for Caucasian booty. He fearlessly describes taking a white girl named Rita to a "Party around the way". We know that this was risky since Rita was white and a "fly cheerleader" no less. Clearly it would be hard for her to fit in at this party around the way. However since "Rita knew how...to shake it like a white girl", she is able to use the power of dance to fit in and earn respect. In "Fifty-Five Dollar Motel" JJ shows his grasp of irony. The song opens with S Jesse's girl Jasmine leaving for a trip out of town. JJ, undoubtedly feeling those carnal urges that we all experience from time to time decides that he "...in the mood to fool around". He procures a date with a girl named Cassie, who like JJ is also in the mood to "do the nasty". Jesse however cannot think of a place for this rendezvous, sadly his place is not possible "because his moms was home", and Cassie's place is unavailable because they "couldn't be alone". After ruling out some other places JJ remembers that there is an Inn in town that only charges $55.00 for a night's stay. After arriving at this Inn a passionate night of love-making ensues, Cassie at one point even does a cheer for JJ screaming, "Jesse, Jesse sis-boom-ba". After this love-making is finished JJ and Cassie are understandably tired and wish to sleep. However "the couple next door were making a ruckus", JJ is unable to sleep and asks the couple to keep the noise down. This proves ineffective and the couple continue to make love quite boisterously. JJ realizes that the female in the next room sounds familiar, and to his horror discovers that it is in fact Jasmine next door. Ever the poet JJ describes this irony with the unforgettable line, "Yo, I got played". JJ shows his social awareness when he explores the evils of gambling on "Dave The Bookie". JJ apparently "had crazy bills and the money was tight". This is understandable because JJ never sold out to corporate America by signing with a huge record label, he always knew that he would find success based on his undeniable and unequaled talent. JJ decides that the only way to make money is to place a bet on a football game with his Bookie, Dave. Sadly JJ's team (San Fran) loses when "Monatna got picked by a Tampa Bay Rookie". JJ now owing $5,000 to his Bookie, on top of his apparently substantial debt decides to go double or nothing. He bets on a Basketball game, but this too back fires when Patrick Ewing misses 2 free-throws at the end of the game that would have won the game. This causes JJ to get sick in a drinking establishment on Broadway, or as JJ so poetically puts it, "he missed foul shots, so I blew my cookies". JJ, now owing Dave $10,000 decides to go to Las Vegas and try and win his money back. While at the Mirage hotel JJ gets hot at the Black Jack Table and wins all $10,000 back. However, JJ's greed gets the best of him and realizing that he can apparently live off of this $10,000, he keeps the money and goes on the run from Dave. JJ's undisputed opus is "College Girls are Easy". The song is so well known that almost no dance club has it on their play list for fear that they will have to play it multiple times in an evening and embarrass other artists whose work quite frankly cannot compare to JJ's. The is one of the most socially relevant songs ever written, accurately portraying the life of many college girls throughout the country. Any explanation of the song cannot do it justice, so I will let this piece of art stand on its own. There will never be an artist quite like JJ, he could "get a party going in a minute or less". Hopefully one day JJ will feel the need to unleash his immense talent once again upon the world. Until the we have this masterpiece to listen to over, and over, and over. "
Read on. Please take no offense to this review, as I find the song titles and lyrics to be representative of 90's white hip-hop and the most failed, but hillarious attempt to be cool:
"Of all the early 90's white rappers with long, blond, curly hair Jesse Jaymes (or as all of his true fans refer to him "JJ") is unquestionably the best that there was, is and ever will be. His fearless and brutal lyrics bridge the ethnic gap between him and other artists in his genre. In "Shake it like a white girl" JJ tells us of his affinity for Caucasian booty. He fearlessly describes taking a white girl named Rita to a "Party around the way". We know that this was risky since Rita was white and a "fly cheerleader" no less. Clearly it would be hard for her to fit in at this party around the way. However since "Rita knew how...to shake it like a white girl", she is able to use the power of dance to fit in and earn respect. In "Fifty-Five Dollar Motel" JJ shows his grasp of irony. The song opens with S Jesse's girl Jasmine leaving for a trip out of town. JJ, undoubtedly feeling those carnal urges that we all experience from time to time decides that he "...in the mood to fool around". He procures a date with a girl named Cassie, who like JJ is also in the mood to "do the nasty". Jesse however cannot think of a place for this rendezvous, sadly his place is not possible "because his moms was home", and Cassie's place is unavailable because they "couldn't be alone". After ruling out some other places JJ remembers that there is an Inn in town that only charges $55.00 for a night's stay. After arriving at this Inn a passionate night of love-making ensues, Cassie at one point even does a cheer for JJ screaming, "Jesse, Jesse sis-boom-ba". After this love-making is finished JJ and Cassie are understandably tired and wish to sleep. However "the couple next door were making a ruckus", JJ is unable to sleep and asks the couple to keep the noise down. This proves ineffective and the couple continue to make love quite boisterously. JJ realizes that the female in the next room sounds familiar, and to his horror discovers that it is in fact Jasmine next door. Ever the poet JJ describes this irony with the unforgettable line, "Yo, I got played". JJ shows his social awareness when he explores the evils of gambling on "Dave The Bookie". JJ apparently "had crazy bills and the money was tight". This is understandable because JJ never sold out to corporate America by signing with a huge record label, he always knew that he would find success based on his undeniable and unequaled talent. JJ decides that the only way to make money is to place a bet on a football game with his Bookie, Dave. Sadly JJ's team (San Fran) loses when "Monatna got picked by a Tampa Bay Rookie". JJ now owing $5,000 to his Bookie, on top of his apparently substantial debt decides to go double or nothing. He bets on a Basketball game, but this too back fires when Patrick Ewing misses 2 free-throws at the end of the game that would have won the game. This causes JJ to get sick in a drinking establishment on Broadway, or as JJ so poetically puts it, "he missed foul shots, so I blew my cookies". JJ, now owing Dave $10,000 decides to go to Las Vegas and try and win his money back. While at the Mirage hotel JJ gets hot at the Black Jack Table and wins all $10,000 back. However, JJ's greed gets the best of him and realizing that he can apparently live off of this $10,000, he keeps the money and goes on the run from Dave. JJ's undisputed opus is "College Girls are Easy". The song is so well known that almost no dance club has it on their play list for fear that they will have to play it multiple times in an evening and embarrass other artists whose work quite frankly cannot compare to JJ's. The is one of the most socially relevant songs ever written, accurately portraying the life of many college girls throughout the country. Any explanation of the song cannot do it justice, so I will let this piece of art stand on its own. There will never be an artist quite like JJ, he could "get a party going in a minute or less". Hopefully one day JJ will feel the need to unleash his immense talent once again upon the world. Until the we have this masterpiece to listen to over, and over, and over. "
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Long time no post...
So, here are the things that have happened to me since my last rant:
1. Very important and happened yesterday, I got admitted to grad school!! Look out Seattle University!
2. I went to Mexico, for the first and hopefully not the last time, evidence:
1. Very important and happened yesterday, I got admitted to grad school!! Look out Seattle University!
2. I went to Mexico, for the first and hopefully not the last time, evidence:
Beautiful!! View from our room; I miss it already.
3. I got a promotion at work! YAY! Now I can cruise... haha, kidding.
4. I ate a bunch of licorice (too much) and puked all night... that was a while ago, but worth mentioning for the laughs.
That's it! That's my life...
Monday, April 7, 2008
You know its too early when...
You listen to a voicemail and after writing down the phone number you realize you've captured more than 10 digits!
Monday, March 24, 2008
Random Thoughts
1. You should never need more than 4 pennies in your possession
2. Pennies are taking over my wallet because I fail to follow item #1
3. Chocolate candies are always better with carmel inside
4. This is stinkin cute:
2. Pennies are taking over my wallet because I fail to follow item #1
3. Chocolate candies are always better with carmel inside
4. This is stinkin cute:
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Canada bound baby!!!
So... No, I am not posting this blog to make you jealous that you aren't going snowboarding in Sun Peaks Canada with me this weekend. And if you believe that statement you obviously don't know me!!! Ha. So stoked. Just had to get it out on the internet.
Here are some pics from the last awesome snowboarding trip I went on in 2006:
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
John... this one's for you! New Years Baby!!
It was requested by my inebriated cousin over the holiday that my blog contain less "jibber jabber" and more substance. Also that it was lacking in pictures. So... my New Years:
Welcome 2008!! I can't wait to see what this year has in store for me since 2007 was so unbelievable!!
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Highlights of 2007
Man! 07 has been a busy one!! An amazing year for me personally. The other, day talking to a co-worker, we began to ponder what major events happend in the year 2007... which is all well and fine; it turns out a lot of crappy things happened in the world (Virginia Tech... etc.). Then last night a pastor steered my attention towards reflecting on my own personal highlights. I started thinking about this on the drive in this morning and MAN! the list is looooong... These aren't necessarily in chronological order but #1 is the most important.
1) I've really submit my life to God.
2) God blessed me with a job at Boeing last February... he answered my prayers in a time when I was living on unemployment.
3) Christina (my bestie) got married!! Congrats!
4) Reconnected with old friends (Heather this ones you ;) )
5) God brought Stephanie (my sister) back to me! I missed my family.
6) I got to spend Mary Jane, Serena, and Ethan's birthday with them for the first time ever! *a tear*
7) I got to spend my sisters bday with her for the first time in years! and vice versa
8) Miriam came home from Japan!!! I missed her tons too!
9) I began volunteering with children at the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance
10) I began working with the childrens ministry at Mars Hill
11) I began working as a female youth leader with Point Break youth ministry
12) I went to Disneyland!! Twice!
13) Mateo turned 1... congrats on a beautiful baby Christina!
14) I've had some adventures in Port Angeles... who hikes at midnight when they have to work the next day??
15) My cousins Nicole and Jacob (on separate occassions) both came to visit me!
16) I've made lasting friendships; Nate, Stephanie, Josh... you know who you are!
17) I turned 25!! Even though I dreaded the day it was the best birthday I've ever had!
18) I bought a new car... hello grey Sentra!
19) God brought Nicole and I closer and we've had some amazing conversation... I am so thankful God's working on her heart. Nikki, I love you immensely and I only want to see you healthy and happy.
20) I bought a new snowboard. Woot!
Alright... Is that enough? I might revise again later. There's a lot to be thankful for this year.
1) I've really submit my life to God.
2) God blessed me with a job at Boeing last February... he answered my prayers in a time when I was living on unemployment.
3) Christina (my bestie) got married!! Congrats!
4) Reconnected with old friends (Heather this ones you ;) )
5) God brought Stephanie (my sister) back to me! I missed my family.
6) I got to spend Mary Jane, Serena, and Ethan's birthday with them for the first time ever! *a tear*
7) I got to spend my sisters bday with her for the first time in years! and vice versa
8) Miriam came home from Japan!!! I missed her tons too!
9) I began volunteering with children at the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance
10) I began working with the childrens ministry at Mars Hill
11) I began working as a female youth leader with Point Break youth ministry
12) I went to Disneyland!! Twice!
13) Mateo turned 1... congrats on a beautiful baby Christina!
14) I've had some adventures in Port Angeles... who hikes at midnight when they have to work the next day??
15) My cousins Nicole and Jacob (on separate occassions) both came to visit me!
16) I've made lasting friendships; Nate, Stephanie, Josh... you know who you are!
17) I turned 25!! Even though I dreaded the day it was the best birthday I've ever had!
18) I bought a new car... hello grey Sentra!
19) God brought Nicole and I closer and we've had some amazing conversation... I am so thankful God's working on her heart. Nikki, I love you immensely and I only want to see you healthy and happy.
20) I bought a new snowboard. Woot!
Alright... Is that enough? I might revise again later. There's a lot to be thankful for this year.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
What.
As I was driving into work today I saw a hoopdie ride... a lowered truck complete with ground effects, tinted windows, and wait... A SPOILER at the end of the truck bed. WHAT??? nuff said.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Why are we super-sizing FRUIT???
Ugh. I am continually frustrated with this country and our obsession with over-indulging... particularly with food!! I draw the line when the super-sizing hits the produce section at my grocery store! I am not kidding, I am biting into a banana this morning and I literally can barely get my mouth around it! What happened along the road that caused portion sizes to inflate so much?? I was in Disneyland a few weeks ago, and as I was enjoying the small world ride my friend made a disturbing comment. They have stopped filling the boats of the ride to capacity because we are now so over-weight as a society that the small world ride boats are sinking!!! Simmer on the irony of that for a moment. Crazy.
Anyfart... this is ridiculous. It has taken me about twenty minutes to eat this banana. I'm not a huge organic person (mainly because its expensive and engineered growth steroids usually end up pollenating with organic stuff anyway), BUT I sometimes buy it if for no other reason but its smaller. It seems ludicrous to me that I can get full half way through a fuji apple!!
Oh, but the best part of everything being over-sized is going to a theater and discovering that a kids sized soda is 16oz!!! I don't have children, but I know there's no way 16oz of sugar packed fluid would make it into the grubby hands of my (someday) children!
Ugh. When are we gonna get it?? Come on America!! Lets be an example. A HEALTHY example.
Anyfart... this is ridiculous. It has taken me about twenty minutes to eat this banana. I'm not a huge organic person (mainly because its expensive and engineered growth steroids usually end up pollenating with organic stuff anyway), BUT I sometimes buy it if for no other reason but its smaller. It seems ludicrous to me that I can get full half way through a fuji apple!!
Oh, but the best part of everything being over-sized is going to a theater and discovering that a kids sized soda is 16oz!!! I don't have children, but I know there's no way 16oz of sugar packed fluid would make it into the grubby hands of my (someday) children!
Ugh. When are we gonna get it?? Come on America!! Lets be an example. A HEALTHY example.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Au Revoir Seattle!!!
Not for good. Don't get all upset! Sheesh. Ahhh... I am cali/disneyland/expensive L.A. dining bound for the weekend. Woot! Ask me what the weather is like down there? How's the weather you ask? Oh, well, it's a smoldering 80 compared to our native 44 right now in Seattle!!! Am I excited? You bet your weet hoo ha I am. This is what Cali was like in September when I was there for work:
This is me happy in the sun.
This is me happy in the water.
This is me happy behind the lens of a camera because I am looking at cute boys.
Oh... this is me happy in the sun again.
I know what you're thinking... this was a work trip? I know, rough life. And somehow I find reasons to complain! Goodness, we're all so ungrateful, me included. Well, you all can make fun of me when I get back from the Cali with a Mickey Mouse ears tan on my forehead!! Oh my gosh, I love Dland. I'm 25, get over it!! Child at heart over here. ;)
K... be on the look out for a post about the good time I had. In the meantime, I'll be thinking about you all!! ...wasting away in this trash weather. Haha. Kidding... but seriously.
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Jessica Dickinson?
K... Most of you don't know this. In fact, I would assume none of you know this about me. I write poetry. For the most part its nothing to brag about but I do it all the same. I find very often that I don't have the words; that I experience an emotion but can't explain it. Poetry is passion and it speaks to me. It speaks to me in the way an abstract painting speaks to me, it's raw and its real. I'm sharing a poem with you that I wrote the other day. It's very ryhmy and maybe not very good, but it came to me. It's mostly inspired by my testimony... Jesus Christ has saved my life. Here it is:
Wandering in darkness, stumbling I fall,
Not seeking, not listening, I faint hear your call,
The void I feel daily and how do I fill?
With parties that poison and drugs that could kill,
In a time of deep loss on my knee's where I found,
My savior who loves me with glory abound,
In mercy and grace you led me from sin,
Put joy in my life where joy's never been,
Daily I thank you for changing my heart,
I desire to be near you never to part.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Friday, October 19, 2007
Fortune Cookies
Haha... I wrote this sooo long ago bored one day at work. I found it the other day (saved to my documents of course) while I was looking for a file.. enjoy:
My translation of what fortune cookie fortunes really mean (because I ate 9 today and then I got bored)…
"You will receive something unexpected in the mail":
Translation: Your cell phone bill is going to be through the roof because you didn’t realize Canada charged roaming fees
"You will be approached with a proposition":
Translation: My Boss is going to ask me to do something that will have me contemplating suicide
"You will meet a new friend":
Translation: “New friend” = Another creepy guy
"You may attend a party where strange customs prevail":
Translation: You will somehow infiltrate a men’s gathering (unnoticed) and watch in horror as they proceed to burp, snarl, fart, high-five each other for being men, and eat till they fall asleep from overload.
"You will travel to an exotic location":
Translation: Nasai Teriyaki in the U-district
"You’ll be invited to dine in an adventurous place":
Translation: A co-worker is taking you to the McDonald’s play space because you are short enough.
...Haha. That's it. The things I do in my free time... ho humm.
My translation of what fortune cookie fortunes really mean (because I ate 9 today and then I got bored)…
"You will receive something unexpected in the mail":
Translation: Your cell phone bill is going to be through the roof because you didn’t realize Canada charged roaming fees
"You will be approached with a proposition":
Translation: My Boss is going to ask me to do something that will have me contemplating suicide
"You will meet a new friend":
Translation: “New friend” = Another creepy guy
"You may attend a party where strange customs prevail":
Translation: You will somehow infiltrate a men’s gathering (unnoticed) and watch in horror as they proceed to burp, snarl, fart, high-five each other for being men, and eat till they fall asleep from overload.
"You will travel to an exotic location":
Translation: Nasai Teriyaki in the U-district
"You’ll be invited to dine in an adventurous place":
Translation: A co-worker is taking you to the McDonald’s play space because you are short enough.
...Haha. That's it. The things I do in my free time... ho humm.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Wow... I love my youth kids
Wow... just like it says. Wow... I love my youth kids. So weird; I uploaded some pics from youth conference to my computer at work this morning. About 10 minutes later this woman walks over (business related question of course) and we get to chatting. I find a way to weasle talk about the kids into the convo so I can show her these pics. ;) Amazing. Just amazing, I almost teared up when I was showing her this pic. I am just so proud of all of them. Man. Seeing God's hand in their lives. Oh... ok, I am almost tearing as I type. Compose yourself Jessica!!! Get it together. They are just so wonderful. They have just touched my heart and I absolutely want to see them live for Christ and not fall away into the pressures they face everyday at school and at home. Oh my gosh. They just hit me.
I had my hesitations going to this youth group the first time. I just settled into a routine at Mars Hill and I'd never really been to an AG church before. I was nervous that I wouldn't be good enough for these kids, that I wouldn't have the words for them. I saw this girl that first night. She was so timid, so shy, and completely lacking confidence. She sings in the worship band and never holds the mic close enough to her mouth. You barely hear her voice resonate. As soon as I met this beautiful girl, I knew I couldn't stop coming. I knew I had to be there. That girl was me when I was younger. That was me. I don't want any of these girls to face the trials and temptations I've seen in my life. I don't want them to learn the hard way that only the Lord fills... that that's not just something we say, but that its real. Oh man. I pray for them everyday. And I pray that God will give me the words. I just pray.
Monday, October 8, 2007
When does waiting become being left behind?
Writing in pink because the text demands it:
My philosophy on love has always been... wait. Be Patient. Don't waste time on boys that you can't be with long-term and don't settle for less than butterflies. Fair enough, right? Well... now I feel like I am being left behind. At my best friends bridal shower yesterday all anyone could talk about was "my boyfriend this, my boyfriend that... and so and so has this many babies." I mean, I'm not trying to have a family tomorrow, but I'm turning 25 in a month. ...third consecutive birthday/holiday season being single. I'm just kind of sick of it. I'm a good gf. Why is dating so hard? It seems to be so easy for everyone else.
...I dunno... I'm so sick of cool Christian guys not asking me out!! I give up. I don't know anymore. I just feel like everyone is moving on and I'm getting left behind in the single pool by myself. Gosh... I feel like that pathetic desperate 30 something. Ugh. I hate this.
My philosophy on love has always been... wait. Be Patient. Don't waste time on boys that you can't be with long-term and don't settle for less than butterflies. Fair enough, right? Well... now I feel like I am being left behind. At my best friends bridal shower yesterday all anyone could talk about was "my boyfriend this, my boyfriend that... and so and so has this many babies." I mean, I'm not trying to have a family tomorrow, but I'm turning 25 in a month. ...third consecutive birthday/holiday season being single. I'm just kind of sick of it. I'm a good gf. Why is dating so hard? It seems to be so easy for everyone else.
...I dunno... I'm so sick of cool Christian guys not asking me out!! I give up. I don't know anymore. I just feel like everyone is moving on and I'm getting left behind in the single pool by myself. Gosh... I feel like that pathetic desperate 30 something. Ugh. I hate this.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Seasons Change...
Summer is gone, it totally is. It's been rainy and windy the last couple of days and I LOVE it. Makes me want to cuddle up with a book and a hot cocoa. Can't wait for Christmas!! Peppermint mocha look out, I am gonna drink ya!! haha...This is my joyful entry. I had such a great evening last night. My good friend did a huge favor for me and my family. I am so grateful for my true friends, because of this person I was able to attend my much missed community group. I was really filled with God's love last night and able to soak in Christian fellowship. Ahh. Deep breath. It was good.
I digress... I opened my window last night and listened to the rain as I fell asleep. Love it. It's so soothing. Something about the sound of water (the ocean, rain, rivers) that just gives you peace. Anyway, seasons change... I feel a season changing in my life. Not sure what that means exactly, but something is on the horizon for me.
Whoever reads this, I love all of you. ;) Muah.
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